Healing as a form of self-love

From birth, along with memories and happy moments, we collect bruises and scars that more often than not, affect the way we choose to live our lives. These emotional injuries evoke different types of responses to different situations and circumstances. Healing and introspecting, I believe is the main thing that can turn generational scars that have plagued families, into generational blessings and powerful deliverance can take place within families, breaking the bondage of carrying the heaviness that comes with those scars and bruises. 

What am I talking about? Well, my best example is always myself. Growing up, my mother used to tell us stories that revealed a lot about the scars that she carried. My mother could tell you the exact date when something happened that hurt her deeply and that would be an indication to me that even though she made a choice to move on, she hadn't really healed. As I got older, I noticed that I did the same. To this day, I can tell you exact situations that have happened that changed the course of my life and how I related to some people that were in my life at that time. Once, I noticed that, I didn't want it for my children, so I decided that I would try and find healing for every memory that was triggered that brought back negative feelings so that my children would learn how to deal and heal in a positive way. 

Before we continue, here are some key indicators that you may need healing:

• You overreact in some situations;

• You always have excuses for your behaviour;

• You always blame others and never look at what you could've done to cause a negative situation;

• You avoid conversations that could help you deal with your negativity; and/or 

• You avoid certain people because you know they will hold you accountable.

Facing and dealing with what hurts to me, is a form of self-love. As much as some people equate self-love to taking a weekend off to perform some self-care ritual, this is even more important as it not only impacts your life but the lives of those around you and those that will come after you. It's not easy facing the moments that tore you apart and in my case, some of those moments found me wanting to end my life, just to make them stop but God willing, here I am sharing this with you.

Now, things that used to absolutely terrify me or that would get a heightened reaction from me no longer warrant that and that's how I know that in that one place where there was hurt and negativity, I have not only moved on but I've dealt with the pain, and have truly found my healing. As a friend of mine said, if it doesn't get the same unhealthy reaction as it did before, then you have healed. However, healing is a journey, not a destination as every day, you will get new opportunities of getting hurt and every day, you will uncover new scars and bruises. The secret is to keep on doing the work. Keep seeking help when, needed and keep looking within yourself for love before looking for it in others.

 Cheers.